016. I’m no longer an autorickshaw virgin! Yep, it was bound to happen. Now it is fair to say that I’m a real man, and I think, if you consider my overall performance, an exceptional real man. I lasted longer than expected. It took 23 seconds before I started mumbling, “Holy Shit! What the [F]uck!”, as the autorickshaw sped through traffic.
Seducing an autorickshaw driver is simple – just do your best to look like a stupid tourist. And remember, any self respecting autorickshaw will play mind games.
“How much to XYZ?” I ask.
“60 rupees.”
I momentarily dwell on the cost of Metro back in DC.
A reasonable price is between 20-30 rupees, but I’m lazy, and not much of a haggler.
“Fine. 40 rupees.”
“Ok, ok, ok. Get in.”
Speeding through traffic the driver says, “I know the best hotel! Better than XYZ. Let me show you.”
Sure, you work on a commission… but I’m a stupid tourist with time to kill, so let’s see. We arrive. I investigate the most expensive room, barf, then leave.
I look at the autorickshaw driver.
“Hotel XYZ please.”
Well at least you sold your virginity for a good price.
Haha.. Jossie, you crack me up!
But seriously.. welcome to my life. Now you know why I detest this particular breed in Mumbai. They're like a hepatitis shot.. painful but necessary!
holymothaofgawd. Hell-to-the-no is any of these places my choice vacation destination. You ARE a man. A real man, in fact, after this trip.
I’m naming my rock and roll band Rickshaw Virgin.
So, it really wasn’t that different than taking a taxi in NYC then.
I am SO right on this one.
If it makes you feel any better, he probably gets commission just for getting you to LOOK at the place. I had an autorickshaw driver basically kidnap me (& my Indian friend) to get a commission in Chennai.